Family of Origin is Always With You

This is the page where I was going to wax eloquently about a lifetime of influence from my early days in the family of origin. I’m still contemplating what I will say here and waiting for the right motivation.

So first I search for quotes and poems about family that represent how I feel – and though I find none that say it all, this one does say a lot and includes the bad with the good which somehow must be included:

“A Family is Like a Circle”

By Nicole M. O’Neal

A family is like a circle.
The connection never ends,
and even if at times it breaks,
in time it always mends.

A family is like the stars.
Somehow they’re always there.
Families are those who help,
who support and always care.

A family is like a book.
The ending’s never clear,
but through the pages of the book,
their love is always near.

A family is many things.
With endless words that show
who they are and what they do
and how they teach you so you know.

But don’t be weary if it’s broken
or if through time it’s been so worn.
Families are like that—
they’re split up and always torn.

But even if this happens,
your family will always be.
They help define just who you are
and will be a part of you eternally.

Wow! There is a lot there to get me started on my family of origin!

Like A Circle

Yep! More of a circle than I want to admit. From teen years on I was critical of Mom & Dad having what later became known (by some) as a “dysfunctional family” which I think is pretty descriptive if not always true of my family of origin. Then I circled around to create an much more dysfunctional family than what I came from, with me supposedly better prepared with a degree in Sociology/Psychology and my supposedly deep religious convictions and seminary training. Yet my family ended up so much worse than my family or origin! And I am still at a loss to explain why, finding it easier to blame it all on Ginger, my wife of choice. 🙂

So many things that I criticized them of became bigger problems with me; such as their lack of communication, no family devotions, no meaningful family times reading books together, telling stories, sharing, and just being a family together. Easier said than done! When I was a senior in high school and a science student planning on a medical career, Mom forced Dad to come talk to me about sex, which was almost a joke at that age. Yet even though I knew it must be early and in stages, I never got there with Jason. And I could go on and on.

The poem verse above on family circle says “. . . even if at times it breaks,
in time it always mends.” Does it? Maybe not “always,” but in various ways there has been “mending” in our family of origin and somewhat even in my family of marriage. But not nearly as perfect as the poem makes it sound. And that bit of negative may be all me or in my head. But I do hope for the best and like that Jerry and I were friends by the time of his death and that Bonnie and I have a generally positive relationship.

Like The Stars

Like A Book

It’s Many Things

It’s Broken

A Part of Me Eternally

¡Pura Vida!

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